I Don't Know Much, But I Know What I Like -- Part 1

There are some things that, no matter how well an author writes, can pull even the biggest fans out of a story.  In this series, which is only a series because I have more than one and it makes an awfully long blog post, I'll be looking at some of those things.  Hopefully, by reviewing them here, I'll be less likely to commit these particular crimes myself.  Stop laughing.  I can dream. 



Right.  On to my first topic, which is...(drum roll)



Repetition:



I'm not talking about repetition for effect, here.  In fact, I'm all for it.  Sometimes repeting things can get a point across like nothing else.  Often, pulling a repetition trifecta can balance things nicely.  What I am talking about is egregious overuse of the same damned thing for no good reason at all.



Today We're Picking On:  Twilight by Stephenie Meyer

(I know, I know, really original with the Twilight bashing.  But, honestly, it's the best example I've got.)  Draw close, kids, and let us take a closer look at Bella and her relationship with pain. 



Bella is constantly engaged in internal monologue about her pain and the pain she's causing everyone else.  After a paragraph or two of -- I can't stand causing him pain, but if I do something else, someone else is in pain, and their pain causes me pain.  It's so painful.  My dad's in pain, too.  I'm going to cause him more pain when I do what I've decided to do, but I'm going to do it anyway.  But it's going to be painful.  To me.  Or to him.  Or both.  Wait...what were we talking about?  Oh yeah, pain.  You know what's painful?  Falling down a lot.  I do that too.  Because, you know, it's not enough to have mental pain, you have to have physical pain, too.  Why, just this morning, I tripped over a perfectly smooth patch of air.  Wanna see my scratches?  Wait.  No.  Don't look.  I don't want you to see my pain. -- I want to sever my head from my body.  You know, to stop the pain.



Seriously, after the first two or three times, we've got it.  Even some of those who've enjoyed these books, and I count myself among them (stop judging me), get sick of this after a while.  Leave the poor dead horse alone.  We don't need to turn it to glue right here and now.



So what about you folks? Are there any books that you feel abuse the repetition privelege?  Once again, feel free to leave your own rants examples in the comments.  Poor Twilight gets picked on often enough.  Let's give it some company.

Iris's Soundtrack

Well, folks, as you probably know by now (since I've been beating it into you), NaNoWriMo begins next week.  I'm preparing as best I can, setting up a soundtrack and the like.  Thought I'd share.



The playlist is small so far, but it will grow as I write.  It may even shrink from time to time as the mood of the story changes.  For now, though, this is the list.



How Fast by Rocco DeLuca and the Burden

Colorful by Rocco DeLuca and the Burden

Superhuman Touch by Athlete

Audience With the Pope by Elbow

Loser by Beck

The Enemy Within by Rush



As I said, it's not very big right now, but the mood is set.  I'll break out the wine, candlelight, and Lemonheads next Monday when we all begin this craziness.  I may even throw in some Werther's if I'm really feeling it.  In the meantime, I'm busy building Iris's world and hoping the playlist grows so I don't have to listen to the same six songs all month.



Can anyone recommend any songs about a misfit kid with a telekinesis problem?  I'm open to suggestion.

Foolish Ranting

Things are still crazy around here.  So much so, that I'm finding myself without a blog topic.  As a consequence, today I'll be addressing random things that bother me.  Here we go.



I need to find a new radio station for my alarm clock.  I need to, but I can't.  The one I have on there is the only one that comes in consistently.  The morning show on that station consists of four idiots, three male, one female.  In the past couple of weeks, I have woken to statements like this:  "I think Jennifer Anniston is more sexy than cute.  I mean, I see where you get the cute, because she's smart and nice and sweet, too, but I think she's sexy.  I wonder why all her relationships fail?  I really hate to say it, you know, but the only reason I can think of is that maybe she's not that good in bed...."  And this gem: "So you mean to tell me that if a coworker came in and told you that they pictured you while they were, you know, taking care of themselves, you wouldn't find that flattering?  I don't get that.  A guy would totally find that flattering.  And don't tell me you don't do it.  I hate it when chicks get all hypocritical and yell at us when they do the exact same thing."    If you don't immediately see what's wrong with those two statements, get out.  Seriously, leave.  You're dead to me.



Lee Jeans.  Stop putting size 2 women in the commercials for your "instantly slimming" jeans.  They don't have anything that needs instant slimming.  We, as a gender, recognize this.  You, as a company, need to knock off the asshattery.  No one appreciates it.



The word "random."  I know I just used it and everything, but it's so overworked that I'm finding myself annoyed by it.  Especially when my kids walk up to me and say things like,  "Bees go buzz.  I'm random."  No, you're not.  You're just spouting nonsense.  This word is getting almost as much incorrect overuse as "literally."   I think I may have to resort to writing with this one.  As in, "You used the word 'random' incorrectly.  Again.  Go get the dictionary and write out the definition twenty times."  Do you think it would work? 



That's about all I've got for now.  I'm sure as soon as I publish this, I'll think of ten more, but for now?  Done.  Next time, I'll try to list more positive things.  In the meantime, feel free to post your own rants in the comments.  Go on.  You'll feel better.

Busy, Busy

It's been a busy week, so I'm afraid you get filler from me today.  The following is the plot summary of my NaNo novel as it currently stands.  I'm sure it will undergo changes before it's done, but right now, this is the central problem.



Iris Baker has just moved to rural New Hampshire. It's the third time this year for her and her father, and it's getting to be a little tough on her. Especially since she's the reason for all the moving.



Iris has a bit of a telekinesis problem.  She was just beginning to get a handle on it when puberty set in -- uncontrollable hormones and psychic abilities don't mix.  Iris has been moving to avoid the resultant scrutiny, but dad has other things he needs to avoid.  Like mom. 



The constant relocating, combined with Iris's inherent differences, make it slightly more than difficult to make friends.  But this new town is different, because Tyler is different, too.  He knows about her.  He knows all sorts of things he shouldn't.  What none of them knows is that mom has found them. 

And she has plans.



So there it is (mostly).  I think it'll be fun to write.  Of course, it's NaNo, so the fun could be short-lived and punctuated by frequent bouts of frustration and stress.  But then, why should it be different than any other story, right?  What about the rest of you?  Anyone wanna share?

We Have a Winner!

Okay, technically there are a few more hours to vote.  If you feel strongly about either of the first two stories and are planning on voting American Idol style...oh, who the hell am I kidding?  No one feels that strongly about what I'm writing for NaNo.

Either way, the crowd favorite, hands down, was YA paranormal.  This is actually a relief of sorts, since YA generally has smaller word counts.  If I manage to "win" NaNo, reaching my 50,000 word count, I'll be closer to a finished first draft than if I wrote either of the other two.  Worry not, fair agents (as if they're actually reading this), I know better than to query a NaNo first draft.  And so do the others here.  Right?  Right.

Which leads me to something that's been bugging me this week.  There's been a little meme happening on the interwebz wherein some writers are asserting their position that for real writers, every month is novel writing month.  They dislike NaNo because it encourages quantity over quality.  They claim NaNo is full of nothing but people who were too weak to follow through with their dreams on their own and all that comes out on the other end is pollution and dreck.

I would just like to point out that this is snobbery of the worst sort.  NaNo is supposed to be fun.  Maybe the majority consists of teenagers writing fanfic, but so what?  Those kids may go on to write masterpieces some day.  And if they don't, maybe they'll be writing fanfic derived from your novels.  Did you ever think of that?  Because if they're writers, chances are, they're readers.  And readers buy books.  And then write fanfic about it.  It's true; I've seen it.

Also, as to the quantity over quality thing, this is small thinking.  There are plenty of established writers who sit down to their keyboards every day and don't get up again until they have at least 2,000 words (Stephen King, anyone?).  That's 60,000 words per month.  It's not impossible.  It's not even a practice I'd discourage if I were giving out advice to aspiring authors.  Writing takes discipline, NaNo can help to teach it.  Moreover, NaNo can help a person decide if he or she has what it takes, not only to write a story, but to do so as regularly scheduled work with a deadline. 

I like NaNo.  It inspires people to read and write and push themselves.  Granted the format is not for everyone, but what format is?  As long as participants know they'll have to edit -- because we must always edit, boys and girls, and not send out our first drafts to any overworked, stressed out agents -- I see no harm.

Incidentally, just because I'm doing NaNo in November doesn't mean I haven't been working the rest of the year.  That's snobbery once more.  Knock it off, it's unbecoming.

So what say you, hmm?  NaNo good or NaNo bad?  Do you submit your NaNo novel to agents in December?  (The only correct answer to the last one is "no."  Seriously.)  And while we're at it, where's the love for the political satire?  Just kidding.  I understand -- no really, I do.  You'll just have to read it once I write the damn thing, because in my head, it's awesome. 

Autumn



This was a holiday weekend for much of North America.  In the US, it was Columbus Day.  In Canada, it was their Thanksgiving Day (Happy Thanksgiving, Canada!).  There was much lollygagging to be done.  My family and I, we took a drive.  We also took pictures.  I hope you enjoy.



This is the view from my front door.  It's getting more colorful by the day.



This is the covered bridge in the next town over. 



 

The bridge traverses this river.



The road we ultimately took leads to this lake.

 



Which has a lovely view of this mountain, the most climbed mountain in the USA and, sometimes, the second most climbed mountain in the world. 



So there you go.  Now you know a little bit about my area.  It was a lovely drive, though it didn't end as I'd expected it to end.  See, usually we end at this candy store about an hour away.  The kids all pile out of the car and get a treat, we hit a coffee shop and buy coffee and cocoa, and then head home again.  Only this year, no candy store.  It was out of business.  There was much disappointment. 

But, hey, we still got cocoa.

Reminder:  Only three days left to vote on what I should right for NaNoWriMo.  Please.

But They're All So Shiny

In case you didn't notice, November is closing in on us.  The start of NaNoWriMo is a short twenty-three days away.  And I'm waffling.

Here's the deal.  I thought I knew what I was going to write for NaNo five months ago.  I had a fairly well developed story idea and plot line with several characters already fleshed out.  Then I had a Shower Moment.  That's not what I meant; get your minds out of the gutter. 

Ideas come to me in the shower all the time.  I don't know why, and I don't care to question it.  I'll take ideas anywhere they'd like to hit me.  (Stop it.)  That's what notebooks and pens are for, right?  And for those of you who are wondering, yes, I have a pen and notebook in the shower.  See?

That pen in the holster writes at any angle, even underwater.  Cool, no?

Where was I?  Oh yeah, Shower Moments.  I was in the shower and another story occurred to me in fairly vivid detail.  It was out of my usual genres of sci-fi/fantasy/horror, but I liked it.  A lot.  So I decided to run with it in November. 

Until.

Oh yes.  Another plot line.  Another story.  Now I have three.  Well, I have more than three, but I have three that are developed enough for November. 

Which one should I do?  That's today's question.  I'll give you a general idea of each and you tell me, what should I write in November?

1)  The first is good, old-fashioned, alien invasion sci-fi.  Of course there's a bit of a twist, there has to be, but the basic premise is that aliens come to Earth.  This one started as a short story that wouldn't fit into a short story.  In fact, I'll be surprised if it fits into one book.

2)  The second is a political satire of the serious, dystopian variety.  No farce, just satire.  It's not funny, not even a little.  The whole governmental structure of the USA goes out the window.  Of course, this happens in the first book, too, but that one crumbles from pressure without while this one crumbles from pressure within.

3)  The third is young adult paranormal.  There is teen angst, but not of the whiny sort.  Plus, family trauma, young love, and psychic powers.

There they are, and now it's up to you.  What the hell should I write in November?  Comment below and/or vote in the poll up there on the right.  Please.  I'm begging here.

Space Cadet

Well, folks, I have a head cold.  Consequently, I'm spacey.  I know, I know -- what else is new, right?  Anyway, what you're getting today is a mish-mosh of thoughts and perhaps some meeping.  Go now, if you must.  Go with my blessing.



Let us begin with the PSA.  It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  If you have breasts, please check them.  If you're of age or at risk, please make an appointment to get them squished.  It's worth it.  Moving on...



My family and I went apple picking this past weekend.  It was glorious weather for it; we had a wonderful time.  However, now we have three pecks of apples that need to be consumed.  That's a lot of apples.  I'll be making apple crisp (my favorite) once I can be sure not to sneeze in it.  However, I was also hoping to learn how to make an apple brown betty.  Anybetty have a recipe for that?  Other recipes you can suggest?  I'd love to hear them.



I'm procrastinating again.  Still?  Yeah, still is probably a better word.  It's to a greater degree, though.  I find that when things build up too much, I procrastinate more.  I wonder why that is?  Whatever the reason, I need to kick myself in the ass and knock it off.  There's laundry on the couch again.  It ain't folding itself.  Magnum took the last mountain, it's my turn.



Columbus Day weekend is coming up.  Not a major holiday for most people, Magnum included.  He'll be working that day.  But the kids have it off from school.  That means that soccer practice, soccer games, religious ed. classes, all will be cancelled.  That sound you heard was my sigh of relief.  We may actually eat dinner at a normal hour. 



One last thing.  I went back to writer's group on Friday.  Once again I wrote from the given prompt; once again I read the results aloud.  I did not 'umm' and 'ahh' all the way through.  I never once begged forgiveness for my nervousness or ineptitude.  I was practically suave.  Okay, that's too much, but I didn't worry that I hadn't brought enough Tums, so there was that.



So that's it.  Don't forget to feel your boobies.  And if you have good apple recipes, don't bogart. 

Nonsense

For those of you who don't use Blogger, the powers that be have decided to make it infinitely easier to access our blog stats.  Now, every time I come to my blog, there is a little "stats" button beckoning me to become obsessive about the people who visit this blog and how they get here.  It's been tremendously educational. 



Except it doesn't tell me everything.  For instance, it doesn't tell my why on earth someone would have placed a link to my blog on a Russian porn site. 



No, I'm serious.  I was looking at the traffic sources and it listed a website that I'd never seen before.  So I clicked it.  I was immediately confronted with a plethora of Cyrillic characters, tastefully punctuated with boobs and crotch shots.



On a more positive (and less creepy) note, it also told me that someone found my blog by searching the phrase "to aspire is to dream."  It's a wonderful sentiment; I'm happy to have been associated with it.  Of course, now I'm wondering how many are going to find the blog by searching words like "boobs" and "crotch shots" and "Russian porn."  Hmmm...



Change of subject.  Today is the official beginning of NaNoWriMo 2010.  Yay!  They will be clearing the boards and updating the site in preparation for November.  For those who are still on the fence, there is an extra special incentive to complete NaNo this year:  Scrivener for Windows.  Those who complete their 50,000 words in NaNo this year will receive a promo code for 50% off.  That brings the total to a minuscule $20.  I am so going for this.



So tell me, how did you get here?  Please don't let it be the Russian porn site.